Your Authentic Refreshment: Kathleen Pooler, Writer and Blogger

I am pleased to feature the Authentic Refreshment Story of Kathleen Pooler, a writer, blogger, and

#JournalChat contributor, who is in the process of writing a memoir and sequel with her hopeful life experience. I appreciate Kathleen's contribution to our #JournalChat Live sessions; she brings a thoughtful, healing vibe to what she shares. Her blog, Memoir Writer's Journey,  represents what comes from her heart and the beneficial purpose of sharing our stories through memoir. Here, Kathleen shares a combination of activities that bring her authentic refreshment: prayer, journaling and positive visualization. 

Kathleen defines what authentically refreshes her: 

The three things that come to mind when I think about what charges my batteries, adds positive energy, inspires and helps me keep a fresh perspective are: Prayer, Journaling and Positive Visualization.

She shares a portion of her memoir, Hope Matters: A Memoir of Faith, revealing her prayer roots and effective positive visualization:

As a "cradle Catholic" I was brought up with all the traditions and ceremonies of the Roman Catholic faith; so prayer has always been a part of my life. My faith slowly matured from a religion to a spiritual journey where I felt God's presence in a personal way. It wasn't until I was diagnosed with a life-threatening illness, Stage Four Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma in 1996 that I sought and found an even deeper relationship with God that sustains me in my times of trial. Journaling and positive visualization also added to my authentic refreshment in a meaningful way, especially during this cancer journey. 

"On December 19, 1996, worsening shortness of breath and a dry cough had precipitated an early morning trip to the emergency room. As I was pacing near my stretcher, waiting for the results of the CT scan of my chest, realizing something serious was happening, I cried out in desperation, 

'Dear God, please give me the strength to do whatever it is I need to do for this is the battle of my life and for my life.'

A peace beyond understanding flowed over me and stayed with me throughout my eventual diagnosis of Stage Four Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma and my two-year treatment course which included chemotherapy, radiation and a peripheral-stem cell transplant. I allowed myself to be open to accepting help from others--meals, gifts, prayers. God had answered my plea to "do whatever I need to do" to fight the battle.

Throughout my treatment, I journaled my feelings and worked on positive visualization. On March 17, 1998--Ash Wednesday--the night before being admitted to New England Medical Center in Boston for a peripheral stem-cell transplant, I wrote a list of twelve positive visualizations: attend my friend's wedding in May, visit my friends in Wisconsin and Missouri during the summer dance at my niece's wedding with hair in October, etc.  I even leafed through an LL Bean catalogue and ordered out an outfit--denim shorts and a gingham blouse in my normal size--that I visualized wearing in the summer. 

And every single visualization I had written came true!"

Kathleen gives a clear view of her specific process to prepare for effective positive visualization: 

Finding a quiet, distraction-free space and time to think and journal, [playing] soothing background music to get in the mood, taking a hot bath in a darkened bathroom with a lit candle, prayer time and playing the piano. 

She shares more specifically about the list she created and visualized during her illness: 

My anxiety and sense of vulnerability--fear of the unknown--over traveling to Boston to start the process of my peripheral stem-cell transplant [prompted this list]. I wrote these visualizations in my journal while sitting in the hotel room the night before my scheduled appointment at the medical center where I was to discuss the details of the procedure with the transplant RN, see the Oncologist who would do a bone marrow biopsy, see the Cardiologist who would make recommendations since previous chemotherapy had damaged my heart. The visualizations helped me to center my thoughts on the positive rather than the myriad of potential negative outcomes. It worked!

The frequency of her authentic refreshment is revealed: 

Positive visualization, prayer and journaling helped me to tap into positive energy during a time when my prognosis was uncertain. It worked so well that I have made it a part of my daily routine. I try to journal daily, even if it is jotting a few thoughts down, but I usually pick up my journal when I need to reflect on my feelings or reactions to something that has happened.

Kathleen shares her preference for refreshing solitude versus sharing with a group:

Often times positive visualization, prayer and journaling are solitary activities, but any of these can be shared when it feels right. I did have an experience while undergoing chemotherapy that steered me away from sharing temporarily. I had attended one meeting of a cancer support group facilitated by the staff at the cancer treatment center. My expectation was that I might not feel so alone if I talked with other cancer patients. The exact opposite happened. I felt dragged down by the negative energy and pessimism in the group. I wanted to focus my limited energies on the hope of survival not the despair of the diagnosis. I never went back.

She shares her enjoyment and sometimes surprising benefit of her authentic refreshment:

All three authentic refreshment activities I have engaged in have grounded me by offering self-awareness, solace and clarity. Sometimes I have been surprised by an insight or recognition of a pattern. Often it has helped me sort out and frame my thoughts. And we are what we say we are, even if we have to "fake it til we make it" initially!

Here is how her engagement provides her with validation of emotions and feelings:

[My authentic refreshment provides] a safe and sacred place to pour out my deepest feelings and needs. I do not need to worry what others may think or deal with their responses. I can feel free to unload it on the page. Then when I read it back, it may take on a different shape than when it was grinding away inside me. Somehow labeling a feeling feels validating and empowering. When I can identify what I'm feeling, I can decide on actions I may need to take.

Nourishment of the soul is also a benefit for Kathleen:

These activities help me to get in touch with myself. I am taking time out of a busy day to pay attention to what I am thinking and feeling. I am honoring myself as I would honor a best friend or someone I love. This helps me get in touch with what I need to nourish my own soul--reinforcing healthy boundaries, helping me embrace my unique humanness, and helping me stay connected to what matters most.

She offers how her authentic refreshment has personally empowered her: 

By reaffirming my values and beliefs, I can act with more confidence. By being clear on my own feelings and boundaries, I can offer the same to others--allow for differences and respect each other's differences. It reminds me of a quote (author unknown), "You can't meet the needs of others if your own needs aren't met."

A final word from Kathleen on what she recommends for others looking for their authentic refreshment:

Learn to trust your feelings. Stop, listen and take time every day to get in touch with yourself and your needs.  Find a way that works for you to learn about yourself and honor your own story.

Kathleen Pooler’s Bio:

            Kathleen Pooler is a writer and a retired Family Nurse Practitioner who is working on a memoir and a sequel about how the power of hope through her faith in God has helped her to transform, heal and transcend life’s obstacles and disappointments:  domestic abuse, divorce, single parenting, loving and letting go of an alcoholic son, cancer and heart failure to live a life of joy and contentment. She believes that hope matters and that we are all strengthened and enlightened when we share our stories.

            She blogs weekly at her Memoir Writer’s Journey blog: http://krpooler.com and can be found on Twitter @kathypooler and on LinkedIn, Google+, Goodreads and Facebook: Kathleen Pooler

            One of her stories “The Stone on the Shore” is published in the anthology: “The Woman I’ve Become: 37 Women Share Their Journeys From Toxic Relationships to Self-Empowerment” by Pat LaPointe, 2012.

            Another story: “Choices and Chances” is published in the mini-anthology: “My Gutsy Story” by Sonia Marsh, 2012.

Your Authentic Refreshment: Quinn McDonald, Author of Raw Art Journaling

I am excited to share the Authentic Refreshment story from the life of Quinn McDonald of QuinnCreative  and author of Raw Art Journaling. She is an avid journal keeper and raw art creator and teacher. Quinn shares various subjects, with a focused genre of art and journal writing on her blog, one of my favorites, which has been shared repeatedly on #JournalChat Links Edition for all things journaling on Twitter. Quinn has taken the time to share the details of how her art and journal writing refresh her.

Quinn shares how she got started and what her Authentic Refreshment entails:

[My Authentic Refreshment] is a combination of thinking through journaling (writing), distilling the ideas, and then expressing the heart of the idea as collage, sketches or abstracts. I've been doing this in one form or another as long as I could hold a pencil, before I knew how to print or write. I made up imaginary "writing." 

I was an extremely shy child with two much older brothers who were not very interested in playing with me. Because my parents were immigrants, we were "different." I  didn't speak English well until I went to school and didn't have a lot of friends. We didn't have TV, so I found my friends and joys in books. I created stories for companionship, to communicate (only in my imagination, as no one read them), and to create places where I was accepted and understood. As an adult, that kind of writing is called, "fiction," and surprisingly, I am a non-fiction writer. None of my journals are fiction. My journals are filled with ideas, thoughts, commentary (generally on social justice) and sketches.

When I write in my journal, it's often stream of consciousness. I don't edit, I don't correct, I don't judge. Days or weeks after I've written in my journal, I will go back and re-read what I wrote. I'll often find a common theme or the development of an idea happening there. Sometimes it's an interesting phrase or a remarkably apt description. I pull those ideas and phrases out for use in my artwork, writing, or blogs. That's distilling. I will add that it's also a process I teach in my journaling classes.  

Quinn talks about her time spent as well as her personal and public approach:

I have several journals--one for keeping track of phone calls, clients, deadlines, ideas. Another for deep writing. One is a Commonplace Book (quotes, ideas from books, wel-written sentences or headlines, titles of books I want to re-read). Another is a sketch journal. The distillation pieces are free-standing pages that are arranged by date, emotion, color, or any other order that seems useful. That's why they are done as free-standing pages.

Writing I do daily. Journaling [is] almost daily. Distilling and expressive arts vary--depending on my schedule--but [are] almost always weekly.

This intensely private work is my own. The resulting artwork is something I will share if it's appropriate--if it has a metaphorical value that others can interpret for themselves. 

She speaks of her inner enjoyment and her unique process:

[My refreshment is] very natural. It's a way of working out problems, choosing ideas, brainstorming. I can't imagine being without my journals. I always thought what I did was "journaling" and it wasn't until I noticed other people using journal prompts that I realized my work was different. 

Quinn shares her changes in perspective and surprising discoveries:

I often start out with one emotion and work toward another. Rainer Maria Rilke said, "No emotion is final."  [Surprising discoveries are] part of the purpose--distilling a wide group of thoughts into something more focused.

Here is Quinn's detail of the validation dimension of her refreshment: 

Deep writing is a way of untangling confusion, lightening sadness, understanding consternation. I often say that journaling allows you to both remember and forget. Remember details that make an event or idea special and forget the pain and fear that comes with living a life.

She shares how appreciation for her true self is one of her refreshment's benefits:  

Writers and artists are often outside the mainstream. Probably because they welcome change and think of risk as safe and safety as risky. In my journal, I can work out emotions that make me feel more connected to a larger portion of a community.

Quinn offers the refreshing nourishment for her soul:

Journaling helps me grow as a human being and spiritual being. That's nourishing, indeed.

She shares the focused and overall benefits of her refreshment: 

[The greatest benefit] is keeping me sane, at the worst of times. Helping me through difficult times, providing comfort in lonely times and helping me find gratitude and joy again. My journal allows me to feel heard. I anticipate the activity, and feel satisfied after writing.

Quinn talks about how her refreshment aids in life purpose clarity: 

The purpose in life can shift or seem new or different. Following the lead is important. I have had several different careers, everything from being an editor at a newspaper to running the Creative Programs department in a huge corporation, to being a financial writer for a large financial investment company. Leaving the corporate world to open my own business--and a creativity coaching business at that--was another life change. I've also lived in several areas of the country, been a single mother for many years, been a wife, the financial support of a family--a lot of different careers, rolled into one. A big requirement for doing several things at once is setting priorities. Keeping a journal helps me discover what is important to me, not just what's urgent to do.

Quinn shares the quality of personal empowerment her refreshment provides: 

I've gained strength from writing, clarity, to stay with difficult emotions. I've learned to let go as well.   

When asked what her favorite part of her refreshment was, Quinn replied with this comment:

Well, that's sort of like asking, "What's the best part of eating--chewing or swallowing?" It's all part of a whole pleasurable experience.

Here is Quinn's Word of Encouragment for those seeking out their Authentic Refreshment:

Don't give up. Keep trying different methods, at different times. Don't quit too soon. Listen to your heart, it will guide you.

BIO: 

Quinn McDonald wanted to be an obedient, dutiful wife and patient mother, but she was born at the wrong time. She became a writer—in ad agencies, in corporations, at a newspaper. Traveled all over the world. Took notes. There was always that restlessness, that raised eyebrow that wouldn’t behave. Then one day, during a performance review, her boss said, "You are different, and seem to enjoy it.” It was not a compliment. The clock on Quinn’s job security ticked to an end. From that day on, Quinn listened to her intuition, quit looking for meaning in life and began making meaning. She is a Certified Creativity Coach, writer, art journaler, workshop leader and rides her motorcycle in the amazing landscape of the Sonoran desert.